Mth 1 old

Well, its hard to believe that its been over a mth now since baby came n my leave started. One third the way over. Its been very tiring trying to get this feeding down. Right now, I pump one while Eva feeds on the other 30 minutes then we give a bottle supplement. I was hoping come 4 to 6 weeks her suck would be strong enough to not supplement butt haven't gotten there yet. There is also the question if my b. milk has enough fat enough to satiate her. Also, she has had lots of gas n possibly diarreah. This week she has been fussier than normal. Its been stressful. Her dr. suggested lactose free formula that we started yesterday. Seems though she is hungrier sooner bout two hours n so fussy if not getting food. I see why I gained so much weight right after Alexus was born. Its stressful to hear that little baby cry more scream with shrill n not know what she is thinking or needing and feeling so bad when she is pushing that gas through with all this force.

I overdid it on Tuesday. Took the baby to run a bunch of errands. She did great. I walked and cleaned the oven. Too much in one day and paid for it yesterday. I was so sore.


Eva is holding her head up more n staying awake n alert longer. Its cute when she sleeps to see her smile.

Though Alexus is so cute sometimes with sister, she is constantly needing to be told, 'stay out of baby's face, don't lean on her, be quiet n calmer' she is trying to sleep, etc.' Its stressful n frustrating. I feel bad but I cannot imagine her being home all day. She is so helpful but I hope this gets better. I guess if they were closer in age, she may ignore her more compared to want to be in her face all the time.

I'm venting today. This helps me release some of this stress. I've got to cut the cookies n blog more