In loving memory....

I'd like to take some time to remember someone that meant so much to so many that passed away suddenly and tragically 9 years ago today...the day before my birthday. His name is Doak Allen Hobbs. He was like a brother to me. Its hard to believe that he left this world at the age of 35...only 3 years younger than I will be tomorrow. Maybe I'm overly emotional/hormonal now with the pregnancy but I do really miss him and would like to express it somehow. He was loved by so many. He could really make you smile..n crack up. Only a few people I know can do that and I hardly see them. I miss that. He'd always listen to you and your problems without judging. I told him things to this day maybe no one else knows. We had so much fun together. He was like a brother to me. Also a great shoulder to cry on. I think we started getting close like this when I was about 15 yoa. After that, we'd hang out, lay out, and just have fun. When I went to away to college, in some ways, we became closer. They come visit me at college and we'd have alot of fun together. He was my dancin' and feel kind of bad saying ,my drinkin' buddy. He was the kind they'd say could have fun at a funeral. I feel like for many years after his death...I subconsciously pushed him out of my memory b/c it hurt so bad. For like 7 years in a row, we'd all go up to ski apache and stay in my grandparents place. It was usually my mom, Doak, Stacy, JW and a couple of other friends I was close to at the time. Every year was such a blast. This time though it was our first morning on the slopes. Just in an hour or so, I was getting tired so I wanted to skip this run and wait for them at the lodge half way before going down to lunch. It was just Stacy, Doak and I at the time. The others seem to be on other slopes. Doak even mentioned it was surprising that I would give up so early considering I was in better shape that year than some others. So Stacy and him headed down a blue run. I think he went ahead of her and she headed in another direction. She came down and met me w/o him. So she and I waited and waited. She said she thought he would have beat her down. I think it all happened that way so we would not have to have seen it all happen. So when all the way to the bottom and that's when our friend Melissa told us that they paged his family to the lodge at the bottom. I thought for sure he had broken something and that my mom would be so mad at us that he got hurt. Little did I ever think it would be so tragic. It was the hardest thing ever to hear the news. Seems like the next couple of days were a blur even his funeral. I know he was so loved. in the article in the paper his mom was quoted in, she said "He was good looking...there was not anyone who did not love Doak. God gave him a special gift of humor. Everybody took their problems to Doak b/c he always had time for everybody." That is all so true and I was so blessed to experience that for at least 14 years of my life.. I came across the article and some pics of him while cleaning up the 'junk' room last month and a box of pictures getting it ready for Alexus, so she could give her room to baby sister. I know it would make him very sad that we don't speak or even close to his mom and family. I know in some ways she probably blames us or holds some resentment b/c he'd never gone if it wasn't for my annual bday skiing weekend. But we all know God has plan and its all about his timing not ours. He knows we'd keep someone so precious around forever. Second to my grandfather, he's been the closest man to me family-wise (a husband is too different to compare). And I lost the most important man in my life growing up, My "Honey" only 5 years priors. There are some things that came from this tragedy that I am grateful for. One is when BIll was there for us (mom and I) through the whole thing, I finally knew he was 'the one' for me. Second, my mom has really turned her life around from a God serving/loving perspective. I'm so grateful for both. I wish he could of been here for so many special things, like walking me down the aisle, the birth of both my girls. I know they'd love their uncle Doak and have so much fun with him like I did. Maybe I should end this tribute on a 'high' note remembering some of those great times with him. I do remember a time in college on 6th street with JW and him n Tracy hitting all the clubs and doing some crazy stuff on the way to the car. I do remember countless sunny afternoons out by the pool either at his apartments or ours. I remember that one July 4th in h.s, we set off fireworks and one rocket thingy went right into our neighbors tree. We hauled butt inside before it caught fire and the police came. I never laughed so hard...his reaction he had like this Homer Simpson reaction to things like that that cracked me up. That's just a couple of so many countless good times we had. I'm glad I can look at them and smile instead of being so sad. I'm sure God had great plans for him and one day I hope to find out what they were. I love and miss you Doak.